Rememberize

Do you remember
When you memorized
That speech in class
But did you realize
It didn’t make much sense
For you to memorize
If you remember
Then you rememberize

So I decided
Not to memorize
Because I wanted
To rememberize
When I got older
I had to realize
Eventually
I’d have to memorize

So memorize
I had to choose
The other word
I couldn’t use
If I mistakenly
Say the wrong word
Then just pretend
You hadn’t heard

By, Randee Saber 12/24/06

How are you doing?

How are you doing
She asked me today
Did she really care
What should I to say

Should I say I’m nervous
Should I say I’m sad
Should I say I’m lonely
And my health is bad

Should I say I’m broke
Should I say I worry
Should I say my feet hurt
And I can not hurry

Should I say I’m homeless
Should I say I’m abused
Should I say my head hurts
And I’m always confused

But my answer will be
Is that I'm doing fine
Because nobody cares
In the checkout line

By, Randee Saber 11/28/06

Are you a baseball fan?

I’ve gone to watch baseball
The tickets were bought
The ball was hit
And always got caught

For all nine innings
And several hours
When no one scored
They all took showers

What’s the attraction
To this game
When every night
They play the same

What’s the mystery
Or the suspense
They keep catching the ball
What a good defense

Sometimes they might
Have a good night
Scoring home runs
Left and right

The players are rich
They’re paid to have fun
Off to the ballpark
The fans will run

Watching grown men
Playing a game
The game never changes
It’s always the same

If there are women
Who do not agree
They’re baseball fans
They’re not like me

By, Randee Saber 6/30/06

Five o'clock shadow

Five o’clock shadow
They don’t have to worry
They won’t go home
To shave in a hurry

I have to shave
My legs are hairy
And under my arms
Too much is scary

I have to pluck
Long hairs on my chin
And wax my eyebrows
To make them look thin

My toe nails are polished
They have to look nice
So I can wear sandals
It’s not a high price

My hair is colored
And cut in a style
I’ll need to return
In a little while

Five o’clock shadow
They don’t have to shave
It’s time to go home
Some time they’ll save

By, Randee Saber 7/3/06

Texas Margaritas

In Texas ya’ll
Find good margaritas
I know since I live here
Senores and Senoritas

Margaritas from Texas
Come from a machine
You’re drinking a milkshake
Without the ice cream

They come in all flavors
Or mixed with some wine
Swirled with Sangria
They taste mighty fine

Make sure you snack
On salsa and chips
The salt on your glass
Tastes good on your lips

I make margaritas
At home in a blender
They’re cheaper to make
I’m not a big spender

By, Randee Saber 6/20/06

101 Ways to cook chicken

There are many ways
To cook a chicken
I like it best
When it’s finger lick’en

Chicken casserole
Chicken pot pie
Chicken spaghetti
Or chicken to fry

Roasted chicken
Or even grilled
But when it’s boiled
I’m not too thrilled

Chicken salad
With apples to add
A Waldorf salad
You just had

Chicken Marsala
Nouvelle cuisine
Chicken is healthy
Because it is lean

Chicken soup
You’ve been told
Is sure to cure
The common cold

Southern fried chicken
I’d rather buy
To make it myself
I won’t even try

By, Randee Saber 11/14/06

Another Mexican Restaurant

A Mexican Restaurant
To take the place
Of a restaurant that failed
It will replace

Another restaurant
Do we really need
With Mexican food
Will it succeed

Fajitas, enchiladas
Tamales are hot
A margarita
To hit the spot

Baskets of chips
They’ll keep bringing more
Chile con queso
On chips you can pour

If they have a coupon
A two for one
To this new place
People will run

Italian, Greek
Home style cooking
Have now become
Mexican looking

I hardly cook
I won’t complain
I like Mexican food
Because it’s not plain

By, Randee Saber 7/6/06

Baby its cold outside

Strapless dresses
No matter when cold

Women like looking sexy

Many dresses are sold

A strapless gown
On her wedding day
If she has a big bust
The gown won't stray

With missing sleeves
There’s no discount
So finish the dress
For the same amount

Men will be warm
In their attire
But when it’s hot
They will perspire

Strapless or sleeveless

Women will wear

Although they'll be cold

They don't seeem to care

By, Randee Saber 12/29/06

Middle age spread

It happened overnight
That middle age spread
You’re an extra large
A size you dread

The food you ate
Burgers and fries
Caused a weight gain
That stuck to your thighs

You’ve given up carbs
Fried foods and snacks
You've haven't lost weight
And tight are your slacks

You'll go for a walk
A few times a week
But when you're hungry
A little snack you'll sneak

Take pride in being chubby
You have a nice full face
You’re still the one we love
Who’s taking up more space

By, Randee Saber 6/27/06

Yiddish words

I have many tchotchka’s
Do you understand
You call them nicknacks
They fit in your hand

It’s a Yiddish word
They will collect dust
Souvenir tchotchka’s
They are a must

I have many shmattas
They are cheap clothes
I’ll give them to charity
And not dispose

I’m schlepping this package
An obvious remark
Too far from the store
My car is parked

That lady has chutzpah
She wants it for free
And talks about people
What a yenta is she

If you are hungry
Get something to nosh
Don’t eat too much
Or you will plotz

I’m shvitzing in here
It’s way too hot
It’s air-conditioned
But not a lot

Kine-ahora
I won’t jinx your success
Mazel Tov
With luck you were blessed

That alter cocker
Much gelt he acquired
He’s old and he’s rich
He’s also retired

Pay close attention
You schmooze, you lose
Don't kibbutz so much
Or you’ll be excused

You’re such a kvetch
Stop the complaining
Sit back and relax
I’ll do the explaining

Although you’re a klutz
You still make me kvell
You’re clumsy at sports
But in school you do well

In everyday language
We use Yiddish words
If you are Jewish
Most you have heard

By, Randee Saber 7/6/06

Flowers

The homecoming dance
A corsage you wore
From your high school beau
Who you still adore

The senior prom
Then graduation
More pretty flowers
For decoration

Quite a surprise
Red roses were sent
To where you work
You knew what they meant

Your choice of flowers
For a bridal bouquet
To match your dress
On your wedding day

Your child was born
Visitors came
Flowers were sent
None looked the same

Birthdays, anniversaries
Flowers suggested
Valentines Day
Red roses requested

A hospital visit
You’ve gotten sick
Flowers were sent
They came very quick

A spray of flowers
On your casket
An array of colors
In a wicker basket

A drought we’re having
Without April showers
Here’s hoping that May
Still brings pretty flowers


By, Randee Saber 8/26/06

Flirting with death

You’re flirting with death
Helping a stranger
Fighting a fire
You’re always in danger

You’re flirting with death
Enforcing the law
Fighting crime
Or a drunken brawl

You’re flirting with death
By going to war
It’s lasted too long
They keep sending more

You’re flirting with death
You climb power lines
Building skyscrapers
Or work in the mines

You’re flirting with death
To capture a shark
Or a mountain lion
For an animal park

We’re flirting with death
When driving our car
Accidents happen
Without going too far

By, Randee Saber 9/11/06

First date

You sat at the next table
This was your first blind date
Did she look just like her picture
Did he look like your first mate

No one fixed you up
Instead you took a chance
You met on the Internet
In search of a romance

Our tables were so close
Allowing me to hear
She'll have a Margarita
He'll have a glass of beer

You both had much to say
But words became too few
When your dinner came
All you did was chew

No need to surf the Net
To find another date
The night's still very young
Who knows what might await

By, Randee Saber 6/5/06

Do you wonder about me

Do you ever wonder
What happened to me
We were once friends
I thought that to be

I used to see you
During the week
My friendship I'm sure
You wanted to keep

Something happened
Something changed
I stopped seeing you
No words were exchanged

I won't lose much sleep
Thinking of you
Becuase our friendship
We'll never renew

By, Randee Saber 6/30/06

Do we need to tell the truth

Did you lie about your age
To eat a senior meal
You said you’re old enough
No money did you steal

Did you lie about your age
You wanted to drink beer
You used a fake ID
In court you might appear

Did you lie about your age
When you were still a teen
Because of an “R” rating
You had to be eighteen

Did you ever say you’re busy
Even when you’re not
That person’s not your type
Who’s put you on the spot

I’d like to challenge anyone
Who says they never lie
That statement in itself
You know, I just don’t buy

I’m not here to criticize
Nor will I condescend
If you lie or tell the truth
It could matter in the end


By, Randee Saber 6/29/06

The Dixie Chicks have returned

Shunned in 2003 after
lead singer Natalie Maines
criticized Pres. Bush
during a concert oveseas
protesting the war;
"5" Grammy Award winners in 2007
Hit record, "I'm not ready to make nice"

Out of frustration
You said what you thought
Then none of your music
Your fans had bought

You spoke your mind
You wanted peace
People got angry
They thought you should cease

For President Bush
You lacked respect
What you said on stage
They didn’t expect

In the USA
You can say what you like
Especially when
You have the mike

This war makes no sense
People agree
With the Dixie Chicks
Their views they now see

Time heals all wounds
Well, maybe some
With the Dixie Chicks
Their return has begun


By, Randee Saber 6/29/06

Apathetic

Apathetic
They don’t care
They won’t take a stand
They wouldn’t dare

It bothers them
For only a while
Protesting
That’s not their style

Sitting in silence
Don’t overreact
Causing attention
Let’s not attract

Offensive remarks
They’ll do nothing about
That will be wise
Without a doubt

I’ll overreact
I’ll cause a scene
Defending myself
Against those who are mean


By, Randee Saber 8/10/06

Different Ships - Different Purpose

With his Nina, Pinta
And Santa Maria
Christopher Columbus
Waved and said “see ya”

In sailing ships
Pilgrims would land
On Plymouth Rock
Many did stand

The immigrants came
To different ports
Upon their arrival
You'd see all sorts

This ship can't sink
But that wasn’t true
On-board the Titanic
Men died with the crew

When war broke out
Men went to fight
Ships built by women
Both day and night

For leisure travel
Go on a cruise
There are many ships
For you to choose

By, Randee Saber 9/15/06

Did you hope

Before you went to sleep
To face another day
Were you hoping it would change
To be a different way

Did you hope that you could walk
When getting out of bed
Instead you’ll lie around
Another day you’ll dread

Did you hope you could escape
The way you're forced to live
Confined for years in prison
Parole they will not give

Did you hope that you’d awaken
To a bed in a cozy place
With lots of food to eat
You surely would say Grace

Did you hope you’d have that leg
You lost it in the war
And now you’re not too sure
What you were fighting for

Did you hope you would be happy
And not be so depressed
You’d wake up in the morning
Eat breakfast and get dressed

Did you hope you’d have your spouse
Beside you in your bed
Everyday is lonely
The one you loved is dead

Before you went to sleep
To face another day
Perhaps you didn’t have to hope
Your life is good today

By, Randee Saber 6/30/06

Count my blessings

When I wake up in the morning
I try hard not to worry
About what could go wrong
Things happen in a hurry

I think about the money
And hope I'll have enough
To pay for all repairs
The times are often tough

I pray my teeth are good
And my vision's still the same
Glasses are quite costly
Plus I still like my old frames

Repairs will always happen
As long as I am living
The house, the car, whatever
My money I'll keep giving

I need to count my blessings
There is a brighter side
I'll handle all these mishaps
With money put aside

By, Ramdee Saber 7/1/06

Birds of a feather

Birds of a feather
Flock together
Whenever they’re at
A get together

People will be with
Their own kind
Because they have
The same frame of mind

The people who are
Of the same race
Will sit together
When at the same place

The rich and the poor
Do not socialize
They have different interests
And lead different lives

Some birds do travel
To another nest
It is their choice
To choose who’s best

By, Randee Saber 6/30/06

Beauty Parlor Cowboy

Look how you are dressed
Wearing cowboy clothes
But a cowboy your are not
So I'm wondering what goes

Inside a beauty parlor
Your'e cutting women’s hair
Looking like a cowboy
While all the women stare

Because you live in Texas
You’ll wear a leather vest
A bolo tie and western shirt
This outfit you like best

You also wear a cowboy hat
Although you will perspire
It covers hair that's barely there
And this is your desire

A beauty parlor cowboy
This has become your fate
Who likes to style women's hair
You claim that you are stright

By, Randee Saber 6/5/06

I'm a coffee drinker

That first cup of coffee
In the morning, everyday
I’ll always have a craving
It will not go away

That first cup is special
The tastiest and best
I’ll flavor it with cream
Black coffee I detest

I love the smell of coffee
It’s like the best perfume
I used to smell it brewing
Into my back bedroom

Mr friend was Mr. Coffee
It always made a lot
I put it in my cabinet
And eventually forgot

I now use a Keurig maker
It makes the coffee quick
But just a cup at a time
With many choices to pick

I have to drink my coffee
I must have that caffeine
First thing in the morning
Otherwise I’ll be mean

By, Randee Saber 6/20/06

Be careful what you wish for

Be careful what you wish for
Your wish, it may come true
Then you may decide
This wish was not for you

You wished to be retired
But then you got too bored
Everyone was busy
Then you felt ignored

You wished that someone died
Because you were so mad
When that person died
You felt very bad

You wished to go to war
The war went on for years
You lost a lot of friends
It caused you many tears

You wished that you could move
Away from your hometown
But now you’re all alone
There are no friends around

Be careful what you wish for
I hope your wish comes true
But if the wish is bad
They’ll be no more for you

By, Randee Saber 6/14/04

Chocoholic-Not an Alcoholic

Chocolate candy
Chocolate ice cream
Topped with fudge
And real whipped cream

A margarita
A glass of Chablis
When I want to relax
A drink pleases me

A glass of wine
Or a can of beer
After a while
My head's not clear

No DUI
While in your car
Eating candy
Wherever you are

Too much candy
You’ll put on weight
Too much beer
A similar fate

Give me kisses
Wrapped in foil
It keeps them fresh
So they won’t spoil

A bottle of wine
With a top you twist
That’s red and sweet
And hard to resist

M & M candies
A mouthful, I’ll stuff
A bottle of wine
One glass is enough

By, Randee Saber 10/4/06

Another new stadium

Our city helped build
A new baseball park
With a roof that opens
When it’s cool, after dark

Thousands of people
Will go everyday
When baseball’s in season
To see their team play

They go and they watch
The men on the team
Playing for hours
They’ll shout and scream

The team plays a lot
But not all year
The fans go often
To watch and drink beef

The old baseball park
I thought looked just fine
With it’s famous dome roof
It would last a long time

Football was played there
It housed both teams
New stadiums wanted
For progress, it seems

Our new football team
Now has its own park
With a roof that opens
When it’s cool, after dark

The season's not long
And tickets sell fast
On weekends they play
The fans have a blast

Baseball and football
Each of thee teams
Their own stadiums
Their own field of dreams

Why not build homes
For those on the street
With no place to live
Whose needs they can meet

By, Randee Saber 6/27/06

Acronyms and Initials

Certain words and numbers
We can identify
In the English language
We never question why

We know that television
Is shortened to TV
It’s easier to say
Don’t we all agree

Initials JFK
Many do remember
A youthful president
Killed in late November

FDR was a president
During World War 2
His legs were paralyzed
Not many people knew

The IRS we know
Will tax us once a year
The money we’ve have made
How much we owe, we’ll fear

The FBI investigates
Crimes that do take place
By helping the police
Protect the human race

Airport acronyms
You will identify
Just make a reservation
Then go ahead and fly

And now there’s 9/11
Events we shall remember
Terrifying lives
Near the middle of September

We’ll keep on using acronyms
We won’t know in advance
When they will occur
They’ll happen just by chance

By, Randee Saber 6/12/06

A fine cup of tea

I once was invited
To go to High Tea
At a beautiful place
So I said certainly

The room was in
A quaint hotel
With wealthy ladies
Yes, I could tell

All decked out
In our finest clothes
Standing together
For a picture we posed

Tables adorned
With pretty flowers
Silver tea pots
To shine, took hours

Fancy pastries
Tasted good
I ate all of mine
I knew I would

After the waiter
Poured the tea
I drank my full cup
Immediately

It’s really my preference
To go to a place
That serves margaritas
They’re more to my taste

By, Randee Saber 6/17/06

Am I praying in vain

When I left the store
I lost my car
Were did I park it
It couldn’t be far

In just a few minutes
My car had appeared
My food didn’t melt
As I had feared

Before finding my car
I said a quick prayer
Not out loud
People would stare

I pray I’ll drive safely
When driving a friend
Who can not drive
Who is on the mend

I pray that I win
When playing a game
I am a poor loser
I must proclaim

Am I praying in vain
Should I really belive
If I do have faith
Good luck I’ll receive

By, Randee Saber 6/22/06

Homes everywhere

Overlooking the sea
On top of a hill
Right by the river
The views are a thrill

An avalanche
A hurricane
A tropical storm
High winds and rain

It doesn’t matter
This view is desired
To look at the ocean
You'll never get tired

Wherever you live
There's no guarantee
Your house won't flood
Or fall into the sea

Safe or sorry
Who's to know
Live where you want
On a hill or plateau

By, Randee Saber 7/18/06

Google it

Google it
A modern phrase
Never heard of
In olden days

Answers to questions
Find what you need
Google will help
With amazing speed

Looking for someone
Use A. T. & T.
No need for a paper
Directory

Webster’s is now
A book on line
Used for words
You’d like to define

Getting directions
Avoid getting lost
Map you request
Without any cost

Websites and Blogs
For information
Buy what you want
Or book a vacation

Google your name
And it may appear
But don’t be afraid
And don’t live in fear

By, Randee Saber 10/26/06

Happy New Year 2007

Another year
Has gone by
The year went fast
It sure did fly

A year of sadness
Or one that was great
Did you exercise
Or gain some weight

Was there a wedding
Or an engagement
A graduation
Or an estrangement

Was there a death
Did a baby arrive
Did you walk
Rather than drive

Did you travel
To exotic places
Or stay home
While your life races

Were you healthy
Or were you sick
A winning ticket
Did you pick

A Happy New Year
Let’s hope for most
Another New Year
Is ours to toast

By, Randee Saber 10/5/06

Shirley Temple - child star

Let me entertain you
Let me make you smile
If only for a little while

My pretty face
My famous curls
I wasn't like the other girls

I would dance
And I would sing
Many smiles this would bring

But I got older
And did mature
A child star, I was no more

Do you remember
Or even care
My childhood, I chose to share

By, Randee Saber 12/19/06

Modern public restroom

It causes me frustration
When I go to take a leak
In a restroom that is public
And one that I did seek

The toilet will not flush
When I want it to
Because it's automatic
It knows just what to do

When I wash my hands
The faucet's just the same
It too is automatic
Is there anyone to blame

The water from the faucet
Will shut off way too quick
Because it’s on a timer
Getting more is quite a trick

And towels are automatic
They're hidden on the wall
After waiting quite a while
No towels dispense at all

Is this considered progress
For a modern day restroom
I can no longer flush or wash
And no towels I presume

By, Randee Saber 5/9/06

Will someone answer the phone

Ring, ring, ring
Goes the telephone
Will someone answer
The answer is known

A human voice
Is rarely heard
A recorded voice
Recites every word

The recorded voice
Tells you what to do
Record your message
Hang up when you’re through

The business you call
Records the voice
Listing menu options
That are multiple choice

How many options
One, two or three
Anymore choices
Really do confuse me

Select an option
From the option tree
They’re away from their desk
You knew they would be

Their cell phone number
You can call
If there’s no answer
They’ll tell ya’ll

That lady’s voice
You’ll always hear
To leave a message
Her instructions are clear

To leave a message
Press one now
Or wait for the beep
You should know how

When a real voice
Answers “hello”
It always reminds me
Of years ago

By, Randee Saber 11/2/06

Coal Miner

A coal miner’s daughter
Sang Loretta Lynn
How proud she was
The mine he worked in

In the late 1800’s
A mining operation
Scranton, Pennsylvania
Became the location

Miners and helpers
Worked a 12 hour day
In cold, damp conditions
Without decent pay

Never getting ahead
Or repaying the debt
At the company store
Their needs were met

Young boys were allowed
To work in the mines
As young as seven
There were no fines

The job was exhausting
Dangerous and dirty
No women around
For them to act flirty

They died very young
From lung diseases
They couldn’t stay home
With sniffles and sneezes

No bathrooms to use
They shared with the mules
And went where they could
Those were the rules

Mining disasters
Often occurred
Would they escape
Wives wait for the word

No life insurance
Or disability
When killed or hurt
At a mining facility

No family vacations
Or happy hours
All they wanted
Were nice hot showers

They kept people warm
By blasting and digging
Far under the ground
They made their living

By, Randee Saber 8/7/06

Never in an orgy

The Viet Nam War
I never protested
Many who did
They got arrested

An innocent protest
Occurred at Kent State
The National Guard
Was told not to wait

Shooting innocent students
Who didn’t have guns
Who ran from gun shots
Some couldn’t outrun

I wasn’t involved
In the sex revolution
It had nothing to do
With our constitution

I wasn’t at Woodstock
I just watched the movie
I did wear love beads
I thought I looked groovy

Make love, not war
Was what they proclaimed
Sex before marriage
They weren’t ashamed

The days went by
Those years went fast
What happened then
Forever will last

By, Randee Saber 6/23/06

Miss America - we miss you

On the Boardwalk
In Atlantic City
Fifty young ladies
All looking pretty

All summer long
We'd eagerly wait
To watch the parade
And stay up late

The beautiful floats
The high school bands
Massive crowds
Filling the stands

The motorcade passed
As we gazed with delight
At the beautiful girls
On a cool starry night

Throughout the week
The girls would compete
In talent shows
Though few would repeat

A scholarship pagent
They tried to proclaim
A beauty pageant
Was the real name

The following week
On a Saturday night
Millions of people
Watched with delight

Those who performed
Showed no fear
An old beauty queen
Would soon reappear

Who would win
Who would lose
The final contestant
We'd try to choose

Changes were made
They got a new host
Bert Parks wouldn't sing
The song I liked most

For so many years
No one projected
A woman of color
Would be selected

Protests and scandals
In later years
A queen dethroned
She left in tears

When summers now end
In Atlantic City
They’ll never return
Those girls who were pretty

By, Randee Saber 12/29/06

Welcome back Superman

Welcome back Superman
You’ve really been missed
In all of your movies
You’ve never been kissed

A macho man
Even in tights
Protecting Metropolis
Breaking up fights

A cape and no glasses
You’re now disguised
No longer Clark Kent
You’re not recognized

A friendship you have
With Lois Lane
Almost telling her
Your real name

It makes you sick
Kryptonite
Don’t get near it
Stay out of sight

Lex Luthor is trouble
An evil man
Always plotting
A dangerous plan

A super hero
We’ve grown to love
You fly all alone
In the sky above

By, Randee Saber 6/28/06

Grandma Eva and her Ouija Board

I remember Grandma
And her Ouija Board
We called her Grandma Eva
Her family she adored

When we’d come to visit
She’d play the Ouija Board
Gathering around her
No one would be ignored

The pointer moved so quickly
On top was Grandma’s hand
She’d spell out all the letters
Our fortunes we’d demand

With many years of constant use
Those letters began to fade
But that old board said to her
“Keep me, don’t make the trade”

I now have Grandma’s Ouija Board
And with me it will stay
Because of my fond memories
Watching my Grandmother play

By, Randee Saber 4/25/06

What kind of dog am I

I won't help you see
That dog I’m not
Or a drug sniffing dog
That sniffs for pot

A rescue dog
I’m not on the team
But by your feet
I’ll lie and dream

I’m not the mascot
For your school
But when you eat
I’ll sit and drool

A greyhound dog
That fast I can’t run
But I'll play fetch
It’s so much fun

No dog shows for me
I’m of a mixed breed
I don’t always listen
I wouldn’t succeed

I’ll watch your home
Each day and night
Those who will enter
You had to invite

I’ll walk anywhere
You want me to go
When I see a dog
I must say hello

Your very best friend
Whenever in need
You don’t have to worry
I’ll take the lead

By, Randee Saber 9/3/06

Sharing a corner

She watches the cars
In need of a trick
Who will be looking
Who will he pick

Where are the johns
There's none tonight
Her pimp will be angry
He'll pick a fight

She sits on a bench
Wanting to sleep
Protecting belongings
She needs to keep

A shopping cart
Filled with her clothes
And plastic bags
Filled with who knows

One comes and goes
During the night
The other wanders
In broad daylight

Sharing a corner
On the same street
One will get beaten
The other won't eat

By, Randee Saber 12/20/06

Mouse in your house - part 2

You say you have a mouse
Who you did not invite
To come into your house
And even stay the night

He really has some nerve
To come in and intrude
He hadn’t been invited
This mouse is really rude

He’ll sneak a bite of food
That’s in your doggie’s dish
The dog is quite annoyed
Please leave is your dog’s wish

It’s hard to sleep at nigh
Knowing he’s around
Although he can’t be seen
The mouse will make a sound

This mouse must go away
Go out and buy a trap
He runs around the house
And hardly takes a nap

Forget about the trap
Go find a cat to borrow
The cat will find the mouse
And cause that mouse much sorrow

By, Randee Saber 5/25/06

Little Mouse

I'm just a little mouse
Running through your house
Watching you read a book
Alone without your spouse

I’ve been here for a while
But I don't think you've seen
The droppings I have left
Because you hardly clean

I try not to be heard
Running through your walls
But it cannot be helped
Because I do have claws

Right now I’m here alone
Another mouse I'd date
To keep from being lonely
This mouse could be my mate

We’d both be very happy
This house has lots of food
We'd multiply like rabbits
When she was in the mood

But if we get discovered
She'll eat the piece of cheese
Not knowing it's a trap
Her body will be squeezed

It’s best if I remain alone
I'll stay here for awhile
I really like your home
I'm used to this lifestyle

By, Randee Saber 5/25/06

My travels

Today I awakened
Surrounded by mountains
The waterfalls looked
Liked giant fountains

I sat by the ocean
The water was inviting
I went to the moon
Which was so exciting

I saw people in kayaks
Paddling down the river
The water looked cold
It made me shiver

I saw the sunset
I watched the sunrise
No matter what I see
It’s always a surprise

I’ll travel everywhere
I do not go by car
No one has to take me
Because it’s not too far

I’ll wake up everyday
To a different scene
While I’m sitting down
At my computer screen


By, Randee Saber 6/15/06

Missing Sock

I’m just a missing sock
With you I did reside
You wonder where I am
I didn't go outside

You put me in the washer
And in the dryer next
As you were folding socks
You then became perplexed

You know I disappeared
It happens more and more
You have so many single socks
Inside of your sock drawer

I am no longer half a pair
And lonesome not by far
I’m with so many single socks
I must be in a singles bar

Don't discard your single socks
Keep them for a while
If they match another sock
You'll have a smaller pile

One day I may surprise you
And never left your home
Got stuck to other laundry
And never did go roam

By, Randee Saber 4/22/06

Fluffy, I still miss you

Fluffy my cat
You, I still miss
A very sweet cat
You never would hiss

A colorful cat
Alone you did roam
You came to my door
In need of a home

I once had a dog
But never a kitty
You weren’t aloof
And you were pretty

A talkative cat
“Meow,” you’d speak
“Don’t forget me”
Attention you’d seek

No need for a box
You’d go outside
Not like a dog
Cats will hide

Nine lives you had
But there's no proof
You never fell
Off my steep roof

You lived with us
But disappeared
You went to die
As I had feared

Fluffy my cat
I’ll always remember
You came to my home
One day in December

By, Randee Saber 9/14/06

I'm a copy cat

I’m a copy cat
Not a pussy cat
Or any ally cat
Or a Persian cat
Or a Siamese cat
That sits on your lap

I’m the kind of cat
Who admires you
Who copies what you do
Because I like to too
And so I’m telling you
I’m a copy cat

By, Randee Saber 12/21/06

Love thy neighbor

You must be suspicious
You must be aware
If they act different
You need to care

Guns collected
A troubled teen
Call the cops
That isn't mean

Little girls
He does befriend
This older man
You should offend

Visitors come
Always at night
Drugs being sold
While not in sight

Your new neighbor
Was here on a mission
He kept to himself
No cause for suspicion

He learned to fly
But how would you know
That into a tower
His plane would soon go

Love thy neighbor
Not anymore
Their behavior
You’re no longer sure

By, Randee Saber 8/11/06

Didn't say no

There was a young lady
Who lived in a shoe
She won so much money
So what did she do

She chose to purchase
A fancy red car
A great big home
With a built in bar

Family and friends
Would soon stop by
They wanted her money
She never asked why

Her money ran out
In no time at all
When she became broke
No one would call

Back to the shoe
She road an old bike
A car payment missed
They said take a hike

She still owned the shoe
It hadn’t been sold
She should have said no
Why wasn’t she told

By, Randee Saber 8/5/06

Was it something I said

Was it something I did
Was it something I said
Did I do something wrong
Now I feel misled

What should I have done
What should I have said
What can I do now
Now that you’ve fled

Will you ever come back
Will you ever return
I’ll take care of you now
Your trust I will earn

If it doesn't return
If it stays away
Then I'll buy a new watch
Later on today

By, Randee Saber 12/18/06

You want that job

You say you want that job
Why should they hire you
Do you have all the skills
This job you will pursue

They want you to be young
But they will not admit
That you are way too old
You’re not a real good fit

You must be slim and trim
No fatties at this place
And though they cannot say
You need to be their race

You had to go to college
In or out-of-state
A state school would be good
But Ivy League is great

You must wear nice attire
And girls, a mini skirt
To help you get the job
Go ahead and flirt

They finally decided
The person who they hired
They chose the bosses daughter
No knowledge was required

By, Randee Saber 12/7/06

The Gingerbread Man

Dressed in white frosting
He's light brown
You'll see him around
With a smile
Not a frown
The gingerbread man
Though he’s not real
He does appeal
To everyone
Who likes to eat
Something sweet
A gingerbread treat
I’ll eat his feet
Before his head

By, Randee Saber 12/20/06

Exploitation

She needs the work
She needs employment
You hire her
For your enjoyment

She sat by you
You bought her a drink
She knew what you wanted
You gave her a wink

For fifty dollars
Or maybe more
She’ll do what you want
Because she is poor

Earning money
While she’s still pretty
She has no skills
What a pity

Wal-Mart, McDonalds
Not enough pay
Her job is risky
Everyday

What did it matter
She meant nothing to you
You didn't matter
It’s what she had to do

By, Randee Saber 7/26/06

Pole Dancer

Not around the maypole
Can you be naked
But in a dark, dingy bar
Filled with cigarette smoke
And the smell of cigars

Hands reaching out
Clutching their money
Feeling my thighs
How much will I make
With these ones and fives

They’ll ask me out
After I’ve danced
After I shower
To be with them
For less than an hour

I’ll go with them
To make extra money
There's plenty to spare
I don't have to share
And no one will care

Not pleasing me
Just using me
For their pleasure
And our get together
They won't treasure

I have mouths to feed
So this money I need
On this pole I will be
And luckily
They still want me

I'm told I look great
I’ve kept my shape
I can work a few years
Among smoking and jeers
Then I’ll go home in tears

By, Randee Saber 12/18/06

The Cat

Look at me, the cat
I’m walking all around
But I am very quiet
I do not make a sound

I come in pretty colors
Yellow, Black and Grey
And if you want to feed me
Inside your home I'll stay

An indoor, outdoor cat
Which do you prefer
It matters not to me
You'll still hear me purr

I promise to be friendly
And will not act aloof
But happy I will be
Underneath your roof

You do not have to buy me
You'll see me on the street
And if you stop to say hello
I may stay by your feet

If you don’t have a dog
I’d like to be your pet
It would be your decision
I know you won’t regret

By, Randee Saber 6/1/06

I won't get another cat

I won’t get another cat
I’m telling you the truth
For once I had a cat
It pooped on our sun roof

My husband wanted air
From outside of the car
He opened up his sun roof
But didn’t get too far

He knew it wasn’t raining
It was a beautiful day
But on his head was pouring
Cat poop and it did stay

That cat was very sweet
But very spiteful too
Because we got a dog
Her days inside were through

I won’t get another cat
Mine went away to die
One day she disappeared
And never said goodbye

By, Randee Saber 6/14/06

I love my dog Rocky

My dog is my best friend
And he was quite a find
He used to live next door to me
And he was just my kind

A puppy he’s no longer
And playful he is not
But he is very loyal
And that sure means a lot

Rocky's now a big dog
And so I have no fear
Of being home alone at night
Because I know he’s near

He doesn’t like to cuddle
And often acts aloof
But if you ring my doorbell
You’ll hear him say “woof, woof”

Those dog toys he won’t play with
Because they're not his style
He prefers stuffed animals
To play with for a while

Rocky loves his daily walks
Where he can have fresh air
If we neglect to shave him
He'll soon look like a bear

He'll lie on my good sofa
This used to bother me
But he’s a special doggie
And that you will agree

I can replace a sofa
I can replace a chair
I can’t replace my Rocky
Because a life we share

So get yourself a doggie
If you don’t own one now
And you will grow to love him
Like I love Rocky, my Chow

By, Randee Saber 4/18/06
Poets Northwest Contest
1st Honorable Mention, 2007

How do you train a dog?

I can’t train my dog
My dog has me trained
Did you train your dog
How, please explain

I’ve tried to train him
By giving him treats
He gets them regardless
If he’s bad or he’s sweet

I can’t let him loose
He’ll run down the street
Instead of sitting
Right by my feet

He frightened a policeman
Who threatened to shoot
My loveable watchdog
He’d execute

He’s chewed the molding
On the back door
Protecting the house
This door I ignore

I wish I could train him
He’s now way too old
To do what I want
To do what he’s told

By, Randee Saber 6/30/06

Creature Comforts

You’re lying on the sofa
And not on the floor
A little doggie
You’re not anymore

It used to look nice
The fabric was clean
It’s faded and old
And lost its sheen

I chased you off
But soon you’d return
I scolded you
Yet you wouldn’t learn

The floor has carpet
In the same room
It’s not good enough
For you, I assume

Your eyes are closed
You may be asleep
On this faded old sofa
I’ll just have to keep

By, Randee Saber 7/9/06

Don't Feed the Animals

Don’t feed the dog
And don’t feed the cat
The cat will eat mice
The dog’s gotten fat

Don’t feed the horse
He’ll nibble on hay
And don’t feed the snake
I’ll feed him today

Don’t feed the pig
I’ll feed him later
And don’t go near
The alligator

Don’t feed the fish
Too much or they’ll sink
And don’t even think
Of feeding my mink

Don’t feed the tiger
She’s on the prowl
She’ll get her own food
She surely knows how

Don’t feed the chickens
They’re laying eggs
And don’t feed the monkeys
The little one begs

Don’t feed the lion
Alone, in his den
If you can’t remember
I’ll say it again

By, Randee Saber 11/28/06